The Double Empathy Theory

Written by Chenoa Scott, 4th-year occupational therapy student, UON

While you’re sitting here reading this, take a deep breath in and out. Parenting a child with autism comes with its challenges, but also powerful opportunities to shift the way we understand social connection.

You may have been told that your child struggles with empathy or social skills. What if that view only tells half the story?

The double empathy theory helps us re-frame the way we see autistic communication. Rather than assuming your child is missing something, it helps us recognise that social interaction is a two-way street and sometimes those streets just look really different.

A misunderstanding, NOT a deficit.

Traditional thinking often sees autism as a condition marked by a lack of empathy or difficulty imagining other people’s thoughts. However, communication breakdowns happen between people with all different neurotypes (e.g., autistic and non-autistic), not just within your child.

Why this matters:

When autistic children are misunderstood, they’re often judged unfairly. Non-autistic people may misread their tone, facial expressions, or intentions, leading to negative impressions or exclusions. Your child may be communicating clearly in their way, but still feel unheard or unseen.

To avoid this, many autistic children camouflage or mask their traits. They try to act more neurotypical to fit in by suppressing their natural behaviors, forcing eye contact, and mimicking others' social cues. This often comes at a significant emotional and psychological cost, leading to exhaustion, heightened anxiety, loss of self-identity, and a greater vulnerability to mental health challenges.

What we can do:

At Harper's Health, our occupational therapists work from a neurodiversity-affirming approach. We don’t try to ‘fix’ your child; rather, we support them to understand their own communication style, build on their strengths, and navigate the world in ways that feel safe and authentic. The double empathy theory reminds us that both autistic and non-autistic people bring something to the table. Instead of expecting autistic children to do all the adapting, it calls for mutual understanding, shared responsibility, and real inclusion.

References:

Crompton, C. J., DeBrabander, K., Heasman, B., Milton, D., & Sasson, N. J. (2021). Double empathy: Why autistic people are often misunderstood. Frontiers for Young Minds, 9(10.3389). Chown, N. (2014). More on the ontological status of autism and double empathy. Disability & Society, 29(10), 1672-1676. https://doi.org/10.1080/09687599.2014.949625. Mezzenzana, F., & Peluso, D. (2023). Conversations on empathy: Interdisciplinary perspectives on imagination and radical othering (p. 316). Taylor & Francis.

Mitchell, P., Sheppard, E., & Cassidy, S. (2021). Autism and the double empathy problem: Implications for development and mental health. British Journal of Developmental Psychology, 39(1), 1-18. https://doi.org/10.1111/bjdp.12350. Milton, D., Gurbuz, E., & López, B. (2022). The ‘double empathy problem’: Ten years on. Autism, 26(8), 1901-1903. https://doi.org/10.1177/13623613221129123